So I’ve come to ask ya sugar, can I borrow your smile?
I’ve lost a little something, And it’s been gone for a while, So I’ve come to ask ya sugar, Can I borrow your smile?
Sick of my damn frown, And the dreaded frown lines, I’m ageing baby, I’m on the decline. I’m stretchin’ those lips, And putting on a brave front, Pushing through, Striving to get in front.
I want a real smile, Not this fake bullshit, ‘Cos nobody likes a sad sack, And don’t I know it.
So I’ve come to ask ya sugar, Can I borrow your smile? ‘Cos it’s missing in action, And been gone for a while.
Never let ‘em see you sweat, Never let ‘em see you cry, Put on your happy mask, There ain’t a tear in my eye.
But it ain’t easy, Putting on a front, It ain’t easy, To bear the brunt. I’m like Kirk Van Houten, Beggin’ to borrow a feeling, But I got plenty of them, So I gotta focus on my healing.
Gotta stop hiding, And stop the damn act, Gotta be real, ‘Cos I’m strong and intact.
So sugar, It’s been gone for a while, But somehow or someway, I gotta get back my smile. I’ll figure it out, I’ll learn how to smile once more, I’ll stretch those lips, Like never before.
Most folks wonder, Why they’re so annoyed, They keep buyin’ stuff, To fill the void. They never take the time, To remove the blindfold, ‘Cause just a quick peep, Would reveal a truth untold.
Ya got plastic, And ya got folding, But don’t throw ya money at me, When it’s him you’re molding.
Cars and stars, And drinks in bars, You’ll be first in line, When they’re sellin’ trips to Mars.
Watch for the water, On the tiles, You might slip. You’re blindfold’s on tight, Baby you’re gonna lose your grip. There’s a place for everything, But my everything is your face, I crossed your line, But baby, I’m not in your race.
I wanna grab ya, shake ya, And rip off your veil, But with just one look you’ll disappear, As quick as melting hail.
Cars and stars, And drinks in bars, You’ll be first in line, When they’re sellin’ trips to Mars.
You feel safe ‘n sound, When ya count ya beans, If ya had all the bucks on Wall Street, You’ll never cash in my dreams. It’s all just a game, Ya keep on sayin’, But it’s my heart strings you’re strummin’, And my soul you’re slayin’.
The stench of the burbs, Is cruel ‘n vile, Come away with me, For just a while. Far from the lights, You can see the night sky, You’ll look up there ‘n see, You’re a slice of magic pie.
Cars, stars, And trips to Mars. Don’t spend your life, Behind self made bars.
The void you’re feelin’, Is a funny sort, It can’t be filled, With somethin’ ya bought.
Cars, stars, And trips to Mars, Cars, stars, And last hurrahs. You’re part of me, And so are the stars, We’re made of the same stuff, On those trips to Mars.
When you roll over, You won’t feel the cold, I’ll be there, But not your blindfold.
Eyes downcast, But she ain’t shy, She’s just afraid, Of the next fuckboy or guy. She’s haunted, And she’s got scars, She’s over the superficial pick-ups, In them sleazy bars.
She says, I’m not enough. He says, well that’s just tough. He says, there’s more to you than what you perceive, And he promises you, He ain’t here to deceive.
She says, I don’t feel pretty, He says, that’s such a damn pity… ‘Cos if you could see what I can see, You would feel, So much more than pretty.
But she don’t feel pretty, So she lurks in the shadows, The darkness provides security ‘cos, When she hides, she knows… That it’s safer here, And nobody can judge her, So she sinks into the inky blackness, And it’s a cozy, comforting blur.
He says, don’t you go hiding, She says, but I’m slipping and sliding… Into an abyss, Where I’ll feel protected, Where I won’t be targeted, Where I won’t be detected.
She says, I don’t feel pretty, He says, that’s such a damn pity… ‘Cos if you could see what I can see, You would feel, So much more than pretty.
But she hasn’t felt pretty, In so damn long, And she don’t even know, What’s right and what’s wrong. Is it fucking stupid, To feel this way, And will it ever? Go away?
So he says, it’s such a damn pity, That she can’t see, What he can see. ‘Cos if she could, She wouldn’t feel so gritty, She’d let her light shine, And feel so much more than pretty.
She’s got you wrapped, Round her little finger, She’ll leave you with, Bad memories that’ll linger. She’s frightening and, She’s fucking scary, So boy you’d best, Be vary wary.
Ohhh she’s haunting… Ohhh she’s taunting…
‘Cause…
She’ll make you burn, She’ll make you itch, ‘Cause boy she’s an, Alpha bitch.
She wears the pants, She’ll set you straight, Her rules ain’t up, For debate. So heel boy or, She’ll tug on your chain, She’ll yank on your leash, And it’s a fine mix of…. Pleasure and pain.
Ohhhh she’s intoxicating, Ohhhh she’s liberating…
‘Cause…
She’ll make you burn, She’ll make you itch, ‘Cause boy she’s an, Alpha bitch.
She’ll possess and, Dominate you boy, She’ll play with you like, You’re her toy. She’ll take you and, Grip your hand, Rough and tight… Her every wish is your command.
‘Cause…
She’ll make you burn, She’ll make you itch, ‘Cause boy she’s an, Alpha bitch.
She’ll make you ache, She’ll make you twitch, ‘Cause boy you’ve gotta love, This alpha bitch.
For those of you who know who I am, you will be aware of the fact I am a single, 32 year old mother. I have a 9 year old son, and I adore him. That being said, I believe that women my age are often placed under unnecessary pressure to either have children, or be happily married. Our biological clocks are constantly ticking, after all. There is absolutely nothing wrong with ‘still being single’. Don’t allow anybody to make you believe otherwise. Don’t you just hate it when people ask if you’ve ‘found’ someone yet? I’m sure I will find someone, thank you very much. But it’s actually totally acceptable that I haven’t ‘found’ Prince Charming yet. I do in actual fact, hope to fall in love again one day, make more babies and create a life with somebody amazing. But there is nothing wrong with me if I don’t. Yes, it’s lonely and can be frustrating. But these intense and sometimes unpleasant emotions work wonders on my ability to write. So therein, lies the silver lining; always look on the bright side of life, as Monty Python says.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
The landscape’s a-changing, And everybody’s breeding, It ain’t her bandwagon, She ain’t desperately seeking.
Don’t wanna be tied down, Don’t need the label, Don’t need the fairy-tale, Don’t need the fable.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
She’d rather take a ride, On the merry-go-round, She don’t give a fuck, When you don’t make a sound.
It ain’t enough she says, And you can’t tame me, No ball and chain, She’d rather be free.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
She’s got her own rhythm, And she’ll dance to her own beat, She’ll take off, You’d better move your feet.
Can you catch her? Wanna try? Is it worth it, You wonder with a sigh.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
That’s their play, And that’s their game, Not her rules, She ain’t the same.
I’ll have what she’s having, No thank you, That ship has sailed, And that’ll do.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
Have your cake, And eat it too, Oh so happy, But she’ll make do.
She don’t care for the clock, She don’t hear its ticking, She’s having fun, Too busy living.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
It’s a competition, But she don’t need to win, She’d rather live a life, Of lust and sin.
They’re all so happy, And paired off too, But nothing lasts forever so, Joke’s on you.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
Why’s she single? Is there something wrong? Cos she’s been alone, For too damn long.
But she don’t need a pair, To make her happy, She’s fine thank you, Her life ain’t too shabby.
Perpetually single, And lonely too, Settle petal, But not with you.
This is where she’ll stay, This is where she remains, She don’t need your arms, And she don’t need your chains.
Disclaimer – you may think this poem sounds bitter; I’ve been through some fairly fucked up shit in my life, and sometimes on occasion I do feel bitter. Plus, Roger Waters is my muse. If you are familiar with Pink Floyd, you will be aware that their music and lyrics are quite dark. Like my soul. Joking. Or am I?
I was inspired to write this poem because an annoying bird wouldn’t shut the fuck up, and kept chirping close by while I was severely hungover. At the time, I’d also been reading a book of poems by Edgar Allan Poe. The bird in question actually reminded me a lot of Poe’s ‘The Raven’, a poem I’ve always adored.
Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe’s ‘The Raven’.
Chirping from its vantage point in the heavens, Shrilling, trilling, One, two, three, four, five, six… And seven!
Resonating, resounding, He simply cannot stay, But this chirping bird, Won’t be led astray.
He’s ringing, he’s warbling, An off-kilter tune, Echoing and piercing, Oh, my misfortune!
Caustically, dryly, Laughing his bittersweet song, This chirping bird, Is all kinds of wrong.
He’s watching me now, His ballad growing louder, I’m frightened now, It’s time I cower!
This chirping bird, Has realised my woes, He’s giggling and a-cackling, And his scornful song never slows.
His stubby wings a-flapping, How I wish he would go away, But this chirping bird, He’s here to stay!
From its vantage point in the heavens, This chirping bird wants to play, Watching and waiting, His dreadful song lasting all day.
But finally, at long last, Day becomes night, Now I can watch and wait for this chirping bird, To take flight.
And oh yes, oh yes, There he is ascending, Wings a-flutter, His mocking song is ending.
But ringing in my ears, His song it still haunts me, Again and again, His song it still taunts me.
And as I turn fitfully over, And open my heavy eyes, There he is, This chirping bird, Soaring in the skies.
He’s a fiend, This chirping bird of mine, And his home is right here…
He’ll take you on a trip, Down lover’s lane, He’ll bring you to the brink, He’ll drive you insane. He’ll leave you wantin’ more, And yearnin’ for round two, Ghost boy’s playin’ the game, And you ain’t got a clue.
He be hittin’ you up, Day and night, Give it up, He’s ghost boy alright.
He’ll be your nightmare, But he’ll be your dream, He’ll drive you crazy, He’ll make you scream. You’ll call his name, And ache for release, But your calls go unanswered, And you’re breaking piece by piece.
He be hittin’ you up, Day and night, Give it up, He’s ghost boy alright.
Ghost boy’s lurking, He’s crawling and he’s creeping, He’s haunting you, Even when you’re sleeping. Ghost boy be driftin’ in and out, Like smoke on a breeze, He’ll plague you, Just like a disease.
He be hittin’ you up, Day and night, Give it up, He’s ghost boy alright.
A flash in the darkness, In the blackest of night, He’s rattling his chains, And you’re drawn to the light. Wanna send that drunk text? Wanna reach out? Think twice girl, ‘Cos he’s out and about.
Let’s chase him up, Let’s follow his tracks, Where you at ghost boy? Did you slip between the cracks? He’s the light to your darkness, And you’re the shadow to his flame, Let’s go for a ride ghost boy, Tell us, are ya game?
Don’t go for a ride though girl ‘cos…
He be hittin’ you up Day and night, Give it up, He’s ghost boy alright.
Valley of the Dolls by Jacqueline Susann is one of my favourite books of all time and the inspiration behind this!
She takes a hit, And waits for the high, She’s the benzo girl, It’s a sweet pill, And an even sweeter lie.
She dashes it down, With whiskey and coke, The high takes over, And she thinks she’s pretty woke. But the supply’s a-dwindling, The demons are at her door, She’s achin’ for that high, She’s yearnin’ for some more.
‘Cos she’s the benzo girl, She takes a hit, And waits for the high, It’s a sweet pill, And an even sweeter lie.
When can she get her next hit? When can she feel the relief? She’s dying embers in a fire place, She’s shakin’ like a leaf. Her mind’s a whirlwind, She can’t even function, Her heart’s a racin’, She ain’t got the gumption.
‘Cos she’s the benzo girl, She takes a hit, And waits for the high, It’s a sweet pill, And an even sweeter lie.
Doctor, doctor, Please give her some more, She’s Oliver Twist, She’s beggin’ at your door. She’s searching for an answer, She’s reaching for the sky, But it’s out of her grip, And she’s still aching for that high.
And when she takes that hit, And when she feels that high, She can take on the world, She ain’t ever gonna die. Diazepam, Oxazepam, And Temazepam too, Little bottles of happiness, Should she take one or two?
Ohhhhh… What it if? What if? Her mind screams, ‘Cos there ain’t no comfort, Even in her dreams…
‘Cos she’s the benzo girl, She takes a hit, And waits for the high, It’s a sweet pill, And an even sweeter lie.
thewritefluff 